Center Blog

George Fesser, LMSW, Director of Center Families

On Wednesday November 16,  Director of Center Families, George Fesser, LMSW, received a Sol Award (Sun Award) from the Hispanic AIDS Forum. Community members gathered at Battery Gardens in lower Manhattan for the event. The Sol Award acknowledges extraordinary acts of compassion, courage and leadership that, like the sun, spread enlightenment, strength, and sustenance for a healthy life.

The Hispanic AIDS Forum created the Sol Award  in 2007 to honor individuals and entities who demonstrate compassion, courage and leadership in our shared struggle to eradicate HIV/AIDS and its root causes from our communities.  According to HAF:

The global AIDS epidemic has spread great misfortune among millions of people, showing us the widespread devastation caused by chronic illness.  As we fight AIDS and other chronic illnesses, it becomes increasingly clear that in the United States and throughout the world the gift of life often depends on one’s ability to buy healthcare. We, however, at HAF firmly believe that quality healthcare is an indiscriminately universal human right. In our profound appreciation of our partners who both share and practice this belief, we are proud to formally recognize their tireless work in the ongoing, collective endeavor to make the fundamental human right to healthcare a reality.

George Fesser at Sol Awards

George Fesser learned early on about dedicating himself to bettering the lives of others. At 19 years old and just out of high school in Miami, George joined the Missionary group “Amor en Accion” and went on missions to Haiti, the Dominican Republic and Guatemala, helping the poorest of the poor. This is also the time when he came to grips with being gay and learned that he was HIV-positive. Being honest and authentic with his fellow missionaries and family members about his status cost him his membership in this Catholic organization, and caused a break between George and his father which continues until today. This was his first stark experience with homophobia and bias against Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender (LGBT) communities and those living with HIV, the virus that causes AIDS.

However, George did not give up. He pursued volunteer work at Miami Children’s Hospital and soon after was hired and worked for a number of years at the adolescent psychiatric ward helping social workers and nurses deal with suicidal teens, 40% of whom were LGBT. Simultaneously, George obtained his Bachelor’s Degree in Social Work at Barry University.

In 1998, George moved to New York City to pursue a Master’s Degree in Social Work. However, a Kaposi Sarcoma diagnoses delayed his plans to begin graduate school; instead he concentrated on beating his cancer and moving forward in his career as a prevention counselor at Streetworks Project, where he worked with homeless teenagers. After one year of chemotherapy, George beat cancer, and began to work for Montefiore Medical Center as a research associate for the New York Academy of Medicine.

Heriberto Sanchez-Soto, Exec. Director Hispanic AIDS Forum (left), George Fesser, LMSW, Director of Center Families (middle), Jesus Aguias, Exec. Director Aid for AIDS (right)

In 2002 he began to work at Aid for AIDS International. After this, George was a Prevention Counselor at the Western Queens site of the Hispanic AIDS Forum, where he worked for almost four years. He then moved on to The Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender Community Center, and while working full time as the Coordinator of Substance Abuse Prevention & Immigration Services, completed his Master’s Degree in Social Work at Columbia University, School of Social Work. During his time at the Center George coordinated and provided direct support services to LGBT immigrants from over 50 countries. George also created the Center’s LGBT Immigrant Social Action Group which helps LGBT immigrants learn more about the laws that affect them and how they can use their stories to promote change in a system that does not recognize the unique needs of the LGBT immigrant population.

In his new role as Director of Center Families, George is responsible for organizing education and support services for prospective parents and families in the LGBTQ community, as well as overseeing the groundbreaking LGBTQ Foster Care Project. George is now engaged to JC his partner of 8 years, and they enjoy a great life together with their Terrier, Oxy.

George Fesser and his partner Juan Carlos Garcia-Lavin

We are proud to have George on our staff and congratulate him on receiving this prestigious award.

“I like to see a man proud of the place in which he lives. I like to see a man live so that his place will be proud of him.” – Abraham Lincoln

Scott Pasfield’s just released book Gay In America should make a lot of places proud. Pasfield traveled for more than three years, logging more than 54,000 miles, as he chronicled the lives of gay men. One hundred forty portraits appear in the book and each state in the union is represented at least once. Pasfield was at The Center on October 17 as part of the Center Author Series to discuss the creation of the book and share the stories of some of the men featured.

The idea for the book came to Pasfield at a time he was looking for a project to rekindle his passion for photography. “I needed a personal project that would speak from my heart,” he told the audience. “The media has a way of portraying gay men and I knew there was more to us than that.”

To achieve the goal of showing as many variations as possible, he posted ads on Craigslist and other sources in an effort to find men who would tell their stories. He said there was a mating dance that would occur as men would contact him. “There was a trust that happened, gay man to gay man,” he said.

Some of the men profiled in the book where in attendance at The Center: Manny & Brian, from Patterson, NJ whose photo was the alternate cover choice for the book; Chip and Gabriel from New York City; and Lt. Dan Choi, who was the final cover choice for the book.

“He is one of the best advocates out there,” says Pasfield of Choi. “It’s an honor to have him on the cover. He came out in a big way and he hasn’t stopped yet.”

Stories that Pasfield shared during his presentation included:

Steven from Miami, who was so comfortable in his skin as a teenager, that the therapist his parents took him to called him the most well adjusted teen he’d ever met.

David from Snellville, Georgia, wrote about his partner’s children trying to figure out what to call him. Since he stayed home with the kids, they settled on “mommy with a beard” as his name.

Henry, Scott and Henry’s son Cameron from Minneapolis, provide one of the sadder stories of the book. Henry is a cancer survivor and Cameron had brain cancer. Their photo shoot was postponed because Henry and Scott were scheduled to be married on a cruise, and Cameron very much wanted to be at the wedding. Two weeks later, the shoot took place and Cameron was so weak, Henry and Scott kept Cameron upright between them. Cameron passed away five weeks later and, a few months after that, Henry and Scott broke up. Pasfield convinced Henry to keep the story and image in the book because Cameron had felt so strongly about the project. It’s also a story that shows that gay families can go through the very same tragedies that everyone else does. This is also the only story that was allowed to be updated in the book; everything else is frozen as a moment in time just as the photographs are.

Jakoury from Chester, West Virginia, was encouraged by his father to learn how to defend himself. In 10th grade that came in handy when he was bullied and preceded to knock the bully out. He ended up gaining respect and starting a gay/straight alliance in the school.

Pasfield says he became an accidental activist because of the book. “If more people took their passion and used it to better their community, the world would change. We all have to do what we can.”

There is some controversy since the book focuses only on men, but Pasfield points out there is no word that signifies “gay men” as there is for lesbians. He hopes someone does a book on lesbians (he’s considered it himself but he’s not sure he could do the topic justice), transgender people and bisexual people. He firmly believes, “to study each group individually gives them the attention they deserve.”

Meanwhile, he hopes the attention focused on Gay in America can secure funding to allow him to do further volumes since there are so many diverse stories across the country.

You can find out more about Gay in America, and see the video Pasfield showed at the start of his discussion, at gayinamerica.us.

By Jeff Adams

Wednesday and Thursday night it’s absolutely critical we show continued strong community support to build a memorial park and learning center at the former St. Vincent’s campus. This is absolutely the time to show that support.  If you missed the previous community board meetings, or came but didn’t speak, now’s your last chance.  If you’ve come before, please come again! On Wed Nov 16th the Parks Committee will review the “final” park plan by Rudin Management before sending on a recommendation to the City Planning Commission.  The Rudin park plan still includes no recognition to the AIDS Crisis and still calls for wasteful demolition of the basement space. We are also making a presentation at the same meeting about preserving the 10,000 sq ft basement to be redesigned with the park as a learning center to teach and exhibit the history and facts of the disease. Please come show your support by expressing your desire for significant memorial features to the AIDS Crisis AND for preserving and repurposing the basement!

On Thurs Nov 17th the Full Community Board will actually vote on its final park design recommendation to the City Planning Commission. We want this recommendation to include explicit memorial features AND preserve the basement space for reuse as a learning center dedicated to the ongoing history of the AIDS crisis.  Please come, sign up and give public testimony. We will stand up together as a group – it’s easy!

Meeting Details – Help Spread the Word

Parks & Open Space Meeting – Discussion of park design

*Presentation by AIDS Memorial Park Campaign

Date:  Wednesday November 16

Time:  6:30 PM

Location:  St. Anthony’s of Padua, 151-155 Sullivan St. Lower Hall

Full Board Meeting and Vote on Park Recommendation
Date:  Thursday November 17

Time:  6:00 PM

Location:  Public School 3 Auditorium, 490 Hudson Street

SPEAKERS CAN ONLY SIGN UP FROM 6:00 TO 6:30 PM 

See you tomorrow and Thursday! 

Chris and Paul  

NYC AIDS Memorial Park Campaign

LGBT parents won’t want to miss this upcoming event on November 16 at 7 PM.

The William Alanson White Institute Parent Center presents:

Sex and the LGBT Parent

• How does creating a family impact on LGBT couple life?
• How do we keep emotional and sexual connection alive with children in the picture?
• How can LGBT parents best use their childhood experiences of sexuality to inform their children’s development?
• How will a changing social landscape make the lives of our children different from our own?

WELCOMING COMMENTS:

Jacqueline Ferraro, D.M.H., Associate Director, The Parent Center

PANEL:

Moderator – Deborah Glazer, Ph.D. is the co editor of Gay and Lesbian Parenting. She is a psychologist/ psychoanalyst in private practice in Manhattan.

Suzanne Iasenza, Ph.D. - “Keeping Emotional and Sexual Connection Alive”

When baby makes three, LGBT couples often experience challenges to maintaining emotional closeness and sexual connection. Unconscious, interpersonal, and practical forces often burden expression of passion and play. Suzanne Iasenza, Ph.D. is on the faculties of the Institute for Contempoarary Psychotherapy (ICP) and Adelphi University’s Postgraduate Program in Psychoanalysis. She is co-editor of Lesbians and Psychoanalysis (1995) and Lesbians, Feminism, and Psychoanalysis (2005).

Scott J. Goldsmith, M.D. - “Letting Our Children Fly Carry-On: The Emotional Baggage of LGBT Parenting and its Role in Children’s Lives”

Wednesday, November 16, 2011
7:00pm to 9:00pm
Pre-registration: $25 per person/ $30 at the door

William Alanson White Institute
20 West 74th Street
New York, NY 10023

To register contact Diane Amato at d.amato@wawhite.org or (212) 873-0725 Ext. 20